Longing for Home

Throughout my life, I have been homesick. It seems that with every new phase of life and changing of the tides, with every dear friend that shifts to an old one, with every new place I've loved and left, the feeling increases. The more I love a person or a place and the feelings associated with them, the more I ache when those persons and places are no longer near to me.

I don't think I'm alone in this, especially around the holiday season. There's a particular longing for home, a lost loved one, a former relationship that is now broken, or a past time of merriment that the nostalgia of Christmastime brings rushing to the mind.

I had severe homesickness during the first part of college. I had been away from home freshman year and worked out of state the summer following it. I saw my family for just a few short days then I had to return to school.

I saw them happily celebrating life together and longed to be there with them. I wanted to live in a family from day to day, as I believe God intends us to, but I knew He was the one who opened the doors for my time at college, so I wasn't about to pack up and go home. I had three more years away from home and I didn't want to do it alone.

Instead, in my loneliness and my desire to dwell in that sweet familial love, I prayed that God would send me a husband. I prayed that He would allow me to enjoy the companionship that marriage brings since I could not at the time fully enjoy my parental family.

Well, God answered that prayer and He answered it promptly. It's honestly shocking how acutely He heard my prayers, those specific desires and petitions and how fully He answered every one of them.

I am blessed and humbled that the God who holds the stars cared for me in my loneliness. And I know that even if He hadn't answered my prayers, even if I was still fighting loneliness today, He would still be good and His way still perfect.

The thing is, my husband and I are almost a full year into our marriage, with one semester left of college. It has been a sweet, sweet journey together, though not without its hardships and lessons. And do you know what?

I am still homesick. It's not the same kind of homesickness as before, though I do miss my family terribly at times (I'm thankful for our visits when we get them).

No, what my souls constantly yearns for is my home. Not the childhood home I grew up in that bustles with loved ones and overflows with happy memories, though I sure love that place. Not my mother's hugs or father's care, though I do love them dearly. Not the church I grew up in, though I thank God for it often. Not the beautiful woods that have become so familiar and comforting to me, though I still find a respite there.

No, I long for HOME. My true home is with God, my dear Maker. The one who fashioned me in the womb, who holds my every thought and prayer, who sees every flaw in me yet loves me wholly and without reserve. My home in Heaven is what I long for.

This home is far greater than any comfort here I may find. Though the love of my husband is a powerful gift that I treasure dearly, his love is merely a glimpse of what is to come with Christ, the Church's ultimate groom.

There, my eternal home, will have none of the sorrow, homesickness, longing, suffering, or pain that this life holds. All will be complete, perfected, and those who are alive in Jesus will live eternally with the triune God, praising Him for all His glory.

One of my favorite hymns sums it up well. Though fitting for times of mourning at funerals, it is also a sweet reminder to the living that this earth is not our home.

"I'm kind of homesick for a country 

to which I've never been before. 

No sad goodbyes will there be spoken,

And time won't matter anymore

Beulah Land I'm longing for you, 

and someday on thee I'll stand.

There my home shall be eternal. 

Beulah Land... sweet Beulah Land

I'm looking now across that river

to where my faith is gonna end in sight.

There's just a few more days to labor,

Then I'll take, my heavenly flight 

Beulah Land I'm longing for you, 

and someday on thee I'll stand.

There my home shall be eternal. 

Beulah Land, Sweet Beulah land"

To listen to a beautiful rendition of this well-loved hymn, click here and worship the King for the promise of what is to come.

I truly believe that every longing we experience here is but an arrow pointing us to a greater spiritual reality. Don't let your longings leave you empty. Look to Jesus and be comforted knowing you will be with Him at last in glory.

This Christmas season we look back on the fulfillment of prophecies regarding the birth of Jesus Christ, the Savior. We celebrate His initial arrival and have faith that we will be with Him again one day.